


Busted

by uleanblue



Category: V for Vendetta (2005)
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-03
Updated: 2013-09-03
Packaged: 2017-12-25 11:27:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/952544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uleanblue/pseuds/uleanblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Evey makes an unexpected discovery in V's kitchen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Busted

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published at FFnet in February 2009.

"Oh my GOD!"

"Evey, are you alright?" V instantly appeared at the entrance to the kitchen.

Evey stood, holding the refrigerator door wide open, a shocked expression on her face.

"The refrigerator..." She sputtered, completely at a loss. "It's.."

"Has it malfunctioned?"

She shook her head slightly, as if struggling to process what she was seeing. "No, it's EMPTY. Yesterday, I could have sworn it was absolutely packed with food."

A pause. "Yes, it was." He answered, noncommittally.

Evey swiveled to face him as she released to door to swing shut, her shock dissolving into confusion. He stood there, silent and enigmatic as a statue, his body language betraying nothing. "So, what? Did you cater a banquet and not tell me?"

V chuckled briefly, then cleared his throat. "No......" He paused. "I ate it."

The atmosphere in the kitchen abruptly grew sharp and uncomfortable. She stared hard at him for a long moment, her brow furrowed in disbelief. "Everything?"

"Evey, surely you don't expect me to leap from rooftops and battle Fingermen fuelled only on rice cakes and a half eaten apple, do you?"

Evey pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth to stifle her reply as the implication of this new glimpse into the mysterious vigilante's habits sank in. "Of course not.....but..." She gestured toward the fridge. "Everything?"

V spread his hands in a gesture that was part conciliatory, part explanatory. "I expend _extraordinary_ amounts of energy in my work, therefore I require equivalent nourishment."

Evey thought she detected the barest hint of indignation in his usually unflappable facade, and fought to suppress the sudden laughter that threatened to erupt.

"Actually, I find it extraordinary that you'd be capable of hoisting yourself off the couch after a binge like that."

V clapped his hand to his chest. "Evey, you wound me. Besides, it wasn't a _binge_." There was a definite edge in his tone now.

Evey pressed on, the combination of hunger and her irritation at him making her bold. "You know, come to think of it, I don't remember you going out last night at all. And there was a funny smell in the Gallery." She crossed her arms over her chest and waited.

V's hand dropped back to his side, but he remained silent.

"Were you burning incense?"

There was a long pause. "Perhaps."

The ensuing silence stretched out, until Evey was forced to concede that no further information would be forthcoming. She sighed, then placed her hands on her hips.

Well, Mr. Vigilante, answer me this, then."

"Yes?"

"Just what exactly am I supposed to eat today?"

_Finis_


End file.
